Author: kestrel
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wish you were here
it is 1am and i am thinking about death again. grief has sunk its gnarly teeth into my flesh and the bones and sharp edges are here to stay forever, i think. perhaps they will erode with time, or perhaps their grip will grow even stronger instead. i’ve made peace with it, but that hasn’t…
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but what if I just rip out of her throat and let eternity slip right down the hole?
I am… very tired. I was able to spend my Saturday attempting to relax, but I slipped away to my hometown early Sunday morning for my grandmother’s visitation. The room she was in was humid and putrid so it didn’t take long before I was extremely overstimulated, but it was nice to see family. My…
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Help I’m Alive
I’ve been really struggling with how to word all of this since I got the news. Even now I’m dreading putting actual emphasis on how real it all is, but my more messy thoughts are being kept in a journal anyway. A couple of nights ago I got a text that my Gramma was in…
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Gender is a Fuck
Ever since acquiring my first chest binder, I have been absolutely ravaged by new gender shit and it’s driving me a bit bonkers. I knew I was going to be more comfortable in my skin with it, but I didn’t realize just how agonizing it would be to be without it on. I’ve been out…
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In the Garden
Made myself a little gardenTo grow myself my only friendsGot myself a brand new start andOh no, I screwed it up againGuess I’m stayin’ up all nightIn my mind but out of sight I’m to blame for thisI hide away until the day is throughI will pay for thisWon’t find a way to push the…
Recent Posts
- wish you were here
- but what if I just rip out of her throat and let eternity slip right down the hole?
- Help I’m Alive
- Gender is a Fuck
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death family death gender mental health personal screaming into the void testing vent work